allow me to provide an essay guiding you through our stay. upon arrival at the hotel, the warm scent of manure was ever present in our noses. despite this, we were able to take in the surroundings (by this i mean a decrepit sign displaying 4 stars and absolutely nothing else) and then enter the hotel. the cabinet displaying football trophies and statues of large women in strange positions were, although confusing, not unwelcome, so we continued on through the bar (which was unattended and smelled of urine) to the garden and pool outside. the floor was dirty, the tables were dirty, the chairs were dirty and even the air felt dirty. alas, we had not yet lost all hope, so we made our way to the rooms upstairs. we entered room 641 (not the only room with these issues!) and it was too much to take in all at once. we were once again greeted with the smell of faeces, albeit human this time. the wood of the door was rotted around the lock, and one of the hinges was broken. on the subject of doors, the toilet door was made of frosted glass that was almost entirely transparent, and the shower only had a frosted glass *****e! the shower was in an alcove separate from the toilet room, therefore anyone who decided to use it (despite the stomach-turning smell) was completely visible to anyone who wanted to use the toilet or sink. also, there was a hairband containing hair next to the sink, confirming our suspicion that the room had not been properly cleaned. moving on to the second half of the room, there were shelves with gaping holes and huge stains on them, which i would be able to ignore, except i’m not blind. the walls were scratched and one looked like something had been ripped off of it. i couldn’t tell if the floor had a thick layer of dust and grime or if that was just the colour an actual person had chosen. the same goes for the beds and curtains, which were a disgusting mustardy colour. however, we were distracted from this by the holes (presumably cigarette burns), stains and hairs on the bedsheets. we were provided with one pillow each, which were so flat they may as well have been sheets, and the mattresses felt like concrete. in addition, the tv did not work, only one of the windows opened (inwards!) and 2/5 plug sockets worked. the ***** light above the windows made a buzzing noise when turned on, so we were usually forced to resort to the shower light, the switch for which was on the side of the sink, or the light above the beds, which was blinding. the towels had the consistency of toilet paper, and only some of them were replaced during the day. we were provided with multiple small bars of soap and sachets of shampoo rather than any bottles. when we returned back to the room after the first day, only one bed had been made, and throughout the week only one bin was emptied. also, there was a €50 charge for anyone who vomited and didn’t clean it up themselves. thankfully none of us did, but this charge must have been a big money-maker gi
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