We arrived at the Gaia Royal, Mastichari, Kos, on Friday 13th October… the date should have been a clue as to how the holiday was going to go! The coach dropped us off just before midnight and as we all got off, the smell of raw sewage hit us. Good start to our time at this ‘4 star hotel’. We checked in, paid over our tax money, received a ‘snack bag’ as we’d missed dinner and were taken by golf cart to our room which was a fair way up the hill close to the mini golf and mini zoo. We opened the door and surveyed our ‘four star, all inclusive room’. Very bare and very basic. The beds had a single sheet and pillow on them. There was a long white sagging shelf over the top of an empty fridge and a small TV fixed to the wall. Not a single bottle of water anywhere! No information about the hotel, not even a solitary pencil! No glasses or even a plastic cup. There was a lovely, friendly black beetle waiting for us who stayed in our room the whole week! We tried to log on to the WiFi to let family know we’d arrived safely. Got a lovely message - Gaia Royal has denied you access. The date plus that WiFi denial were harbingers of things to come! We opened our snack bags and stared very crestfallenly at the stale, hard sandwich containing a slice of plastic burger cheese and a slice of hard packet sliced ham. There was also a banana which was green and hard. Off to our wonderful beds, we decided! Next morning, we switched on the shower which triggered another gust of sewage smell coming up from the drains. We walked down the hill, past the mini golf and mini zoo to the main hotel block for our 4 star, all inclusive breakfast. We were met with what looked and felt like a school canteen at St Trinians. Children and cats racing around! We walked around the food servery counters and surveyed the offerings of cooked items swimming in pools of fat and metal trays of cold meat, cheese, pastries and fruit. The smell of raw sewage drifted around the restaurant and the squadrons of mosquitoes were out in force. We skipped lunch after the breakfast experience and headed to a pool in the afternoon to try and relax. Eventually got a sunbed and settled down to relax after the journey and enjoy our four star hotel…. So the drinks and snacks on all inclusive…. The soft drinks were concentrate diluted with water. Cheap, unpleasant and syrupy. We hope the bushes appreciated them more than we did! The alcoholic offerings were watery and bland leading me to ask was there actually gin in my gin and tonic? Water was not available on all inclusive. So that leads on to the hotel wanting you to upgrade to ‘Ultra All Inclusive’ so you could have proper drinks and water. The cost of that delight was €15 a day each and everyone on the booking had to upgrade whether they wanted it or not! That would have added another €210 to the extortionate amount we’d already paid for this fabulous four star hotel! So to dinner that evening…. We made an effort to look smart as the hotel instr
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